September 29, 2010

A Bit Of A Funk...

Hello again!  I have admittedly sucked at this blogging thing for the past few months.  Though I have come to realize that as much as I put on a happy face and a good front, I've fallen into a bit of a funk.  With everything that has been going on I would like to think that it's understandable but the happy go lucky person in me is angry at myself.  There is so much to be grateful for and so many things that could be going wrong that it seems very self defeating to let a bump in the road get me down.  I don't think most of you know what our bump consists of so let me give you a run down.

Earlier this year, around about June, things started changing at Jasey's job.  He was generally treated like scum off the street.  No recognition was given to the years and devotion he had given the company.  Ultimately, he was left without a job.  In those months we did a lot of talking, figuring and re-figuring, budgeting and re-budgeting.  Our final decision... move in with my mom and rent out our home.  So, the middle of August we packed up, moved in with mom and less then a month later had our home cleaned, painted and rented.  We have been in mom's house for a month and a half now (I can't believe it's been that long already) and everything is going good.

The upsides...AJ and Ryan have Momah around all the time, which is good for them and also good for my sanity at times.  Kids and dog have a huge yard to run around in now, something that Jasey and I always wished we had at the townhouse.  It was in the plans to move next year anyway (still not sure exactly when or where) and now we are mostly packed up so it should be an easier move when the time comes.  The best thing that has come out of the whole situation is that Jasey is no longer at that job.  Yes, it's not an absolute ideal situation but, I have wanted him out of there for so long that this is one of the best things that could have happened.  Jasey is as busy as ever but he now has time to concentrate on school, with the stress of the job he was having trouble focusing.  He also has time to buckle down and study for the GMATs which he now has a test date for taking.

The downsides...the biggest one of course is that we are not in our home.  We were there for three years, it was our first home.  AJ was only a few months when we moved in, he started walking and talking there.  We found out we were pregnant and Ryan was born when we lived there.  We celebrated birthdays, anniversaries and holidays.  We made friends, became a family and made a home.  Honestly, I can't think of any other actual downsides, there is just the overall feeling of funkiness.  Yes, money is tight, but I'm not a big spender.  Sure, it's tight living quarters, but it's not like I had 'no kid' time before.  I don't see Jasey all that much, but that certainly isn't anything new.

If I didn't know that there was a very good reason for all of this or if I was a pessimist then I would be in a very bad spot right now.  But I am an optimist and I know that, even though it may seem like a long way off, everything will pay off and every young family has to go through tough times to get to where they want to be.

I will leave you with some words of wisdom from Marshall's girlfriend, Deri..."I say if life is a road, then problems like this are the construction zones that fuck things up for a bit to make them better! So while this might be a difficult time, I believe it might just be the thing that makes life even better." 
I couldn't have said it better.  :)