Everyone, even if unintentional or never voiced, has passed judgment on another at some point in their lives. You may not see yourself as mean or judgmental but sometimes it happens before we even know it has. I am an INTJ personality type, the 'J' stands for judging. I was a bit offended by my own personality calling me judgmental. That is, until someone pointed out that it may not necessarily mean that I judge people but more that I judge situations, all logical like, instead of flying by the seat of my pants. Yet, there I was jumping to conclusions and judging myself. Luckily I was also a 'T' (thinking), and worked through the point made to me and let my personal guilt subside. But a perfect example of how easy it is to judge someone, even yourself.
A friend of mine is a blogger for an online moms group based in Connecticut, CTWorkingMoms. Working with TheBump.com, they have been campaigning to end all the mommy wars that go on between mothers in all walks of life. March 4th will be Moms for Moms Day. A day to show support for other moms and encourage judgment-free motherhood.
Have you ever…
*Scoffed at a mom going to the drive thru at a local fast food restaurant?
*Wondered 'what in the world was that mom thinking' when she dressed her kid like that?
*Looked down your nose at a mom that fed her baby with a bottle?
*Thought less of a woman who had her children by c-section?
Look at it this way…
*That single mom is down to no food in the house, the last five dollars to her name and doesn't get paid for 3 more days.
*This mom decided to pick her battles realizing that matching outfits was a lot less important than tantrum free mornings and a happy child.
*This mom tried to breastfeed, but her milk never came, she knew actually getting her baby food was more important than how.
*That mom wanted to give birth naturally but it ended up safer, for her and baby, to have a c-section, she felt like a failure as a woman and it took her along time to come to terms with it.
Take a moment tomorrow, and hopefully every day thereafter, to send love and support to mothers around you, whether you know them or not. Smile at the harassed looking mom in the grocery store and compliment her or tell her how you've been in her shoes. Tell you neighbor how brave she is for educating her kids at home/or for working outside of the home. Hug your friend with the new baby and tell her that she is a wonderful mother.
Post a picture tomorrow, with a sign showing kind words for other moms, on Twitter or Instagram and use the below handles and hashtags
@ctworkingmoms @thebump #moms4moms
You can also post a picture or some words of support on Facebook, or blog it, and tag ctworking moms and the bump (linked above).
I want to take a moment to share a mom in my life who is going through a tough time and needs love and support. I'm sure you have all heard about her from me by now, but it's worth sharing again. An example of how you never know what someone is dealing with in their lives and judging them is the last thing to do.
My best friend, Jeannine, is 34 years old, married and mother of 2 young girls. Less than a year ago she was diagnosed with MDS, a type of blood cancer. She has undergone monthly chemo treatments, multiple blood transfusions and weekly doctors appointments just to get herself healthy enough to have a complete stem cell transplant which is scheduled to begin in a months time. She has continued to work and care for her family, yet has had to take a lot time off for all of her treatments. She will now have to take a minimum of 6 months off for the transplant, which will displace her to another state and 4 hours away from her family. You wouldn't know any of this by looking at her. You can read her story HERE. If you are able to donate it will also be greatly appreciated.
Thank you for taking the time to read about my best friend. I hope that even if you couldn't donate at this time, you remember her story, you just never know what someone is going through. Show love to your fellow moms...and also hug your children a little tighter. Please post a picture tomorrow to share encouragement and support for judging less and loving more. Also please share this blog post or the donation link for this family.
Today it is hard to be thankful, but I am thankful for the pure love that children bring to our lives.